M.O.M. CHALLENGE DAY 14

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

M.O.M. CHALLENGE DAY 14

Today's chapter in Proverbs starts out with "A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands." ~ Wow! The impact that verse had on my spirit the first time I ever read it (years ago) really hit me hard. I knew right then and there that I did not want to be a foolish woman... but what did that mean to me?

Well, to me it meant that building a home takes love and patience, brick by brick love is held together with the mortar of patience. Yeah, it does take two to tango, but there are three involved in my marriage: GOD, Chris and ME. So if I feel like Chris is slackin' I talk it over with GOD, I tango with the lover of my soul, and you know what? Often HE reminds me of where I am slackin'...HE encourages me to work on what needs fixing in me, then that totally takes my mind off of Chris!!! I have learned to trust GOD to deal with my husband. I trust GOD. Sure it takes many other things to build a house and a home, but Solomon does not talk about building a house here...anyone can live in a house, but a home implies a place where there is warmth and love. Togetherness.

Spiritually speaking I know that when I decided that I did not want to be the foolish woman, HOLY SPIRIT heard my heart's cry and HE has stood by me all of these years reminding me not to give up on my marriage, on my kids, on myself!  Altough there have been a few times when I didn't know if I could even survive. That was when I just had to endure.

Sometimes I have felt like a "silent partner" in this marriage...let me explain. There have been many times that I have had to retreat to a quiet place to pray, read my BIBLE or go off like an animal and lick my wounds. I have often used the "silent treatment" as a means of survival, which has worked out better for me in the long run, I believe, than arguing or being "mouthy". Had I been an "in your face" loud woman who had to be heard, (that's just not me) our marriage would never have survived! If I had had to be right or even heard we would have all been a lot more frustrated! I don't have to make my point. I don't have to be thought of as right. I have heard time and time again that "There are two sides to every story" and that is true, but ya' know what GOD told me once? HE said, "Yes, there are two sides to every story... but there is only one TRUTH," and HE  already knows the TRUTH...HE is the TRUTH! 

I don't have to fight with my husband or anyone else to be heard. But I am no door mat either! Even though on occasion that may appear to be the case, I don't care what it looks like...I don't have to look like a winner...I am a winner, because I know I am on a journey to HEAVEN. My story has a happy ending, because I know GOD is my Contender! And HE knows how to put the best "SMACK DOWN" on my enemies whether they be flesh and blood or spirits & principalities...Noooo, I am not in control, I am not a control freak, don't need to be! If I find that someone is trying to walk all over me, I just seperate myself from them, sometimes it is permanent or maybe just for a season, but I am not a glutton for punishment, and I will not be abused or manipulated! I don't have the need to be a martyr either, though.

The Martyr will use false humility as a counterfeit to manipulate people...she's like the "humility poser". My word for the year 2012 is "HUMILITY". I am learning what that truly is. It is a choice, like LOVE and I choose true humility. I don't have to talk louder than anyone else, or interrupt people, or dominate a conversation because I know the TRUTH and the TRUTH has set me free from all of that noise.

I know I am heard (by GOD) so what does it matter if anyone else is even listening? Sure, I have been wounded, but I have also wounded others, and honestly I would prefer to be the wounded one than to be the one doing all thw wounding... running around hurting others.  I can take a wound, because I know who to take it to...Daddy GOD.  I have found that to be the one running around hurting others requires me to be selfish, immature and insensitive. I confess I have been there, done that. I have learned that that is not who I am, it is not who I choose to be. I used to play that song (by JEWEL) over and over again..."I'm sensitive and I'd like to stay that way."  I really am.

I have found that because I have chosen to nurture my sensitivity, I can hear GOD's voice a little more clearly. Rather than having to communicate with GOD by shouting through a thunder storm, I go off to a quiet place and talk to HIM. He whispers encouraging thoughts to me. And when I felt like tearing down my home with my own two hands (or my words) HE would gently remind me of the choice I made years ago...  to chose love. Whenever the storms of life raged around me, HE brought me back to my center (in HIM).

JESUS CHRIST is my center, HE is the place of peace from which I can make the wise choice to build up instead of tear down. (Sometimes that process would take weeks, other times it happened faster) I know though that when things seem so bleak, and everything looks like it is over, there is still the possibility of life, no matter what the circumstances are. I have seen miracles with my own eyes... honestly, I saw a dead man who was drowned in a pool come back to life after we asked GOD to intervene. GOD restored my marriage when it was dying from cancer...actually it may have already been dead, but I believe that with GOD all things are posssible (to those who believe)! 

I can only speak for my experiences in building up my own home, and I can tell you honestly that I can look back and see that I could have done a better job if I had not focused on me sometimes. I confess I have grown weary in this marathon I call my life, but I have definitely found that through it all GOD has cultivated the fruit of the Spirit of Endurance in me (Yay GOD)! Along with Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Gentleness, Faithfulness and Self-Control...(o'kay HE is still working on the fruit of Self-Control in me!!!) But I know that my marriage, sanity and peace would definitely have been impossible without GOD. I trust GOD.

*Trusting God to direct us (through the advice of others) is an important step in life recovery. But we can not trust blindly... a healthy trust in others is developed gradually and carefully, over time. It is our responsibility to determine when it is safe to be vulnerable and if the guidance we are receiving is GODLY. If any advice is contrary to the TRUTH revealed in the BIBLE, it should be disregarded, no matter who gives it! (*LRC notes.) We have to learn to hear GOD's "voice" and to trust HIM to guide us. 

That is what this M.O.M. challenge is all about. I hope that I am encouraging you to put  your life on a shelf for a few minutes or an hour or so every day so that you can get to know GOD a lot better... through HIS Word. I am doing just that, and I would not ask for those moments back for anything.  I am singin' Sinead O'Connor's  song in my head right now..."NOTHING COMPARES TO YOU (GOD)!

Blessings,
Shawnie